09 February 2011

February 4th

First, I'd like to start by saying don't mean to offend anyone with what is written here. It's simply an attempt to organize my thoughts. This is a truthful account, I did not fabricate or omit anything written here. Tomorrow my blog will return to its normal state of affairs trying to spread a little happiness.

Friday night after work I met my boyfriend at a midtown Manhattan bar called The Ginger Man for fancy schmancy beer and a hot dog with bacon. On our walk back to the train we took a detour into Macy's on 34th Street so he could show me a tie he liked. As we were headed down the very wide, main walkway two girls were walking toward us. Right toward us. In NYC (and usually the whole US) its typically polite to walk the way you drive, on the right side. We were walking hand in hand on the right.
The two girls walked straight into us, one saying,"Make up your fucking mind." As if we had done something wrong.
Both of us indignantly said, "Excuse me."
I'm going to pause right here. Did anyone say anything about skin color? No. Was this a very big deal? Not really.
One of the girls turned around and started screaming, "What the fuck did you just say to me? What the fuck did you just say to me you white fucking bitch?! Yea walk away whitey! Walk the fuck away!"
I turned around because I wasn't one hundred percent sure she was yelling at me. When I did figure that out, I was going to walk over to her and ask her to stop. There was a security guard, fighting with her never crossed my mind. It must have crossed my boyfriends mind, because he dragged me away before I could say anything. Sure, we'd been drinking and I was tipsy, when added to adrenaline could signal to someone that a fight might ensue.
She proceeded to follow us screaming (in a store with security guards), "Yea walk away you white fucking cracker. Walk the fuck away. You thought you was gonna fight me? Fucking white cracker bitch." You get the picture.
I yelled back, "This has nothing to do with being white. Its not even about being white!"
She ran into the revolving door with us where Rich pushed me through the door and stopped her as she pounded on the glass still yelling about how I was a "white bitch," and he told her to stop. "It's over. Stop. We are leaving."
The Macy's security guard stood there. Chuckling. Also black. Agreeing with this girls actions by not stepping in.
We walked out, Rich leading me from my lower back, walking me across the street.
Then everything went starry. Then dark.
She had run up behind me in the middle of 34th street and punched me in the face from behind. Still yelling, "You deserve what you get you white fucking bitch."
Rich pushed her and her friend off me.
I wiggled free from Rich and saw a cop car mercifully turning the corner and started pounding on the hood. "Please stop, she just punched me in the face," I yelled not realizing their windows were down.
The cop rolled his eyes at me. "Stop yelling in my face."
Two police officers get out of the car and restrain her from hitting anyone else. Another cop car pulls up. Witnesses come forward and confirm my story that the girl had come up behind me and hit me, unprovoked. No one actually mentioned the words she was using while she was swinging.
Out of nowhere she pushes past the police officer, points in my face and screamed, "She called me a n----."
I feel sick and dizzy just writing that. At the time, I immediately burst into tears and I felt my hands shaking with rage. The indignation I felt was beyond words. That is an epithet that I would never hurl at anyone under any circumstances, and I have been known to toss the dreaded "c" word around from time to time.
An officer put his arm around me and walked me to the curb, engulfed in steam from a hotdog cart I cried, "I would never say that. She chased me. She hit me. I did not say that."
Somehow the officer passed me off to Rich who pulled me across 7th Ave. He was telling me that the cops needed us to leave. We were told to walk away as though nothing happened.

Why?

In a post near Christmas I wrote about how magical I think Macy's is. I will never set foot in there again.
I used to believe that police were there to serve and protect. The NYPD proved me wrong. Apparently accusing someone of using a horrible word trumps assault. Fear of being thought a racist by not believing the truth drives the police to only protect certain people is what I've learned. People who clearly don't understand that their actions ought to have consequences.

Did this girl not see that she was insulting all the people, of every race that believe in true equality? By playing the system in this way she made a mockery of equality.

I knew a teacher once who reprimanded a student who then wrongfully accused them of using that word, and the teacher was forced out of their position by the principal. No questions asked.
In middle school a girl I had been friends with wrote "White piece of shit" in my locker with a sharpie. I knew who it was because she was the only one with the combination. When I was told I would have to pay for the damage, I asked "Why would I write that in my own locker?"
I've had friends tell me the reason they got into a better college than me is because of their race. Because they are considered a minority.
My grandparents survived the Holocaust and came here because America was a place of hope. Hope for a better life for their children, my father. I was always taught to believe in that hope.

The cycle of racism and blame makes me dizzy and sick. I'm just so disappointed in the world in a way that I have never felt before.

Also, my face really hurts, its stinging with emotion and a purple bruise.

54 comments

  1. Wow, that is quite a story. I am getting angry myself just reading it. Although nothing that drastic as getting punched has ever happened to me, I have had similar phrases thrown at me in the past as well.

    I have friends who say the 'n' word in front of me and I tell them I don't like it (these friends are mostly hispanic.) You can't throw words around like that, but people have no problem calling me a white bitch etc...

    I really feel for you girl. Racism is still very much a part of society and people are so sensitive nowadays that no one wants to get involved in those sorts of altercations.

    I hope you feel better. It sucks that your awesome night of beer drinking and food had to be runined.

    I'm sure you know that for every ignorant ass out there, there are millions of people who don't give a shit what you look like or where you walk.

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  2. Racism comes from BOTH sides. We are all people, we are all minorities. I am honestly so hurt for you. I am angry for you. Hate SUCKS.

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  3. Oh my gosh, I am so, so sorry Kallie. Things like this, where people use race as an excuse, make me unbelievably upset. People have fought so hard, and so long to try and create equality for everyone, no matter what race, or gender, or religion. When people do things like what that girl did to you, lying and using racism as a power card, it just baffles and horrifies me. I'm so sorry you had to deal with this horrible thing, but the important thing is that you are safe. Hope you're feeling better soon <3

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  4. The girl sounds like an absolute c**t, not to waste words.

    A related thing happened to me in elementary school, though not nearly as bad as this. But there was a group of kids who used to chase me around, and when we were all hauled in for questioning, one kid with a hearing disability claimed that I had started it by calling him "deaf kid." Obviously not on the same level as your story, but then again, I was ten and I was shocked...

    Sounds like this girl, apart from being a c**t, has a major chip on her shoulder and has learned that playing the race card is effective. Due to history and countless examples where she would have been in the right, she gets away with it. I think you just have to remember that she's obviously not a happy person to behave that way. You could also make a complaint about the police behaviour, perhaps (or maybe I'm just being naive here).

    I do think it's a different issue from the college admissions however. Those are in place to respond to a history of systemic discrimination and continued deprivation among a large part of the black community.

    Still, a horrible experience, Kallie. Sorry to hear about it.

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  5. Yeah, that girl sounds like "C U next Tuesday." I am really really sorry that this happened - it sounds insane and hateful and awful and just all around horrible. And I can't believe the ass hat security guard at Macys just watched it happen and then the NYPD did nothing. What a joke.

    xoxo ~ Courtney
    http://sartorialsidelines.blogspot.com

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  6. Wow. This story reminded me of something that happened to me a couple days ago except flipped. I'm sorry this happened to you. I wish I knew what the fuck was going on in that girl's mind...

    That's not fair that she dropped the race card. Even if you had used it, there is no reason to have gone that low. What was she trying to prove?

    Again, I'm sorry you had to go through this. Some people are ignorant, hateful. I will never understand.

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  7. Oh My God! This makes me sick to my stomach, specially because I had a similar experience when I was only 16 years old with a 30ish or 40sh old black woman who thought I was "white." And it happened right in New York University Hospital, and even though she was just screaming at me because she thought I had "looked at her wrong," the officer who was right there never even told her to lower her voice. I was in the hospital so I just assumed there must have been something wrong with her head and obviously she had gone through so much in her life that if a "white" person dared even glance her way it was automatically about her race. I was so young, I just stared at her while she screamed at me. I can't even explained how much this affected me. It satyed with me for weeks, I was so shaken up about it.
    I'm so sorry you had to go through this. Youre experience was so much worst i can't even imagine how you feel. Theres so many crazy people out there, whatever race, whatever color, it does not judge. And worst, theres so many others that don't do a thing about it. Its just unfair, and sad.

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  8. Oh my goodness, I actually feel like I'm going to be sick by reading this post. I feel like one of my good friends has just been hurt! I can't believe someone would actully be so hateful as to accuse someone of saying such an awful word. It is pretty hard to misunderstand that word. As for the security and cops not helping you when you had clearly been assaulted, that is disgusting. Also, that girl could have gone on to hurt you further! I'm so sorry this happened to you, you must be so upset still. It is such a shame that the magical world of Macy's has been shattered.

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  9. Oh my! This makes me so angry. I really hope you're okay. This is such an upsetting story and such a tricky subject that words fail me. Something of the kind happened to my mum when I was little (even though, luckily, violence remained verbal) and she was accused of being a racist because she supposedly "stole" someone's parking space while she had actually been waiting there before the said person. It is so sad that racism becomes the excuse and erases the real cause. A couple of years ago, in France, a Jewish woman reported a racist crime that had happened in a train. The medias talked about that incident for days, weeks on end without really checking their sources. It was then revealed that the woman had completely made that up. But in the meantime, radical opinions were voiced and religious balance was upset. Of course, this is a pity because it sheds a black veil upon REAL racist or religious attacks against minorities but why should it be so easy to take sides and excuse everything under such a pretext? Why should the sensitivity and irrationality have the upper hand as opposed to reason and sensible talk? Forgive me, I'm being idealistic right now.
    Hope to read more pleasant news in the near future. Thanks for sharing anyway. Take care xx

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  10. I'm so sorry that you had that happen to you!
    It's always bugged me how "they" can treat us white crackers however they want and we have to turn the other cheek because they are the minority, how is that equality? It's not! I would love to see true equality, to see everyone get treated exactly the same, get into schools, hired on for jobs, treated with decency and respect no matter what color their skin happens to be!!
    Being singled out because of race is being singled out because of race, it seems like as long as the singling out benefits them they don’t mind it to much!

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  11. Oh, Kallie, how awful. I feel so sorry for you. This event was terribly upsetting. I understand why it's still weighing on you.

    Of course you did nothing to provoke the girl's behavior. Some people are just damaged. There can be no excuse for her conduct.

    Both Macy's and the NYPD are at fault also. Store security should have stepped in and protected you. And the police should have taken you seriously and attended to your wound. Unfortunately, in my work I see cops act like this all the time: they refuse to get involved and do their job.

    Don't focus on race in reviewing this incident. Nothing in this event was racial or racist. The insults hurled at you were merely a disturbed person's idea of vitriol, not something actually related to you or what you did.

    Again, I'm sorry. I hope you heal, physically and emotionally. It may take time. Let your friends comfort you while you're hurting.

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  12. wow, reading this makes me feel so angry all over you have no idea. i'm so so so sorry that you had to go through this. i would have freaked out if someone did that to me, i'm not sure i would have had the same patience you did. you were strong and wise not to do anything, and the police are pigs for not doing anything to defend you. why are there police anyway if they fail to do their job?! hearing stories where the people we see as authority and security figures do nothing to help a person in need shows how much they are big fat disgraces to the world.

    this girl is the poorest of poor excuse for a human being. you do nothing, yet she acts upon herself to pick a fight. i agree with the comment above, don't focus on the whole race issue. this person is just a little ignorant piece of the world and her words were not pointed at you even if it sounded like they were.

    i'm so sorry. i really really hope you find the strength to get passed this. i'm pulling for you, please remember that!

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  13. Oh my goodness. I'm so so so so soooo sorry this happened to you :(
    I really don't understand how people can call for equality when things like this happen....completely unprovoked. I hate that things even today in 2011 still boil down to race. WHO CARES WHAT COLOR YOU ARE!? It really doesn't matter. I hope your face feels better and I'm so sorry you had to go through this! I have had my fair share of issues like this, usually when I'm running. I've had people role down their windows and yell "run white girl, run" and worse things that I'm not going to type. I hate that things like this still happen. I hope the world shapes up soon!

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  14. I don't usually comment on the blogs I read (don't like being yet another Anonymous commenter) but this was such a powerful (albeit unfortunate) story that I wanted to say something. It never ceases to amaze me how a plain disregard for decency still seems to direct the actions of so many people. For this person to have acted out so unnecessarily against you because of your race and then to wrongfully accuse you of doing the same is outrageous.

    I am appalled that the police didn't attempt to get the full story about what happened and shooed you away like the whole situation was your fault just because the race card was pulled. It shouldn't matter what colour you are, everyone deserves to have their side of the story told and to receive justice.

    I hope your face heals up soon, but more importantly I hope that you can feel safe again and keep your head held high (bruise or not!)

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  15. oh my gosh, i'm so sorry that this happened to you! it's so low of someone to try and place the blame on another by playing the racism card. i would have been so angry with the girl and the police, in fact, i'm angry for you! it really sucks that racism is still relevant at all. :(

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  16. Wow! I live in NY (Queens) so I know how stupid some girls can get. It upsets me to read what happened to you, ugh. Something like that once happened to me when i attended school in Brooklyn. But we got into a really big fight. I can't believe the cops did not do shit. So sorry to hear that.
    Daisy

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  17. Oh you poor thing that is truly horrible. I am angry just reading this post. The Police seem to be scared of doing any thing now a days. Chin up girl it can only get better xx

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  18. ugh. i am sorry something like that happened. it sucks it happens anywhere to anyone.

    but Macy's is still magical! don't let an ignorant duo and an envious security guard change that for you. think christmas windows. shoe department. bridal. floor one and a half! now where else can you find that!

    i do hope you heal quickly!

    xo~jane

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  19. This is horrible and horrifying and I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. I honestly cannot believe how incredibly stupid and hurtful people can be. Reading this whole incident made me so mad--from that crazy lady attacking you to the indifferent security guard to those cops who basically didn't care. Ugh ugh ugh. I'm sorry Kallie, please remember that not everyone is like this, you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

    xx

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  20. Why people feel the need to be rude and hurtful for no reason at all is beyond me. And to think that nothing was done to help your or get your side of the story through the security guard or the NYPD is just unacceptable. It doesn't matter who you are, NO ONE should be treated this way. If it's not too late, I think you should file a complaint with Macy's about the security guard. He obviously wasn't doing his job. As other commenters have said, not everyone is like this.

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  21. Oh Kallie, this is so shocking, I hope you're OK. I don't know what to say. It's awful how the police acted towards you, but at the same time you can sort of see their impossible situation - arresting that girl could have made their statistics look ... racist? I'm not defending their actions at all, just sad that our world is so governed now by oversensitivity that the real problems aren't being dealt with.

    I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. You know those people that you meet and say "You couldn't meet a nicer person"? You always seem like that sort of girl to me. Hope writing about it has been cathartic at least. Take care xx

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  22. This story makes me very angry too! Just the fact that people play the racist card like that, and get away with it. When you've done absolutely nothing wrong. My neighbour (who is Asian) has called me and other neighbours racist, when she in fact parked in a disabled parking bay meant for my neighbours who have a disabled kid, who've had to badger the council to get the bay in the first place. It is seriously frustrating when people do this. Obviously this girl knew that the "n word" was a huge deal, argh it's just so annoying. I hope you do have some faith left in the system, but episodes like this do dent what little you may have. It's not like we're going to go around saying, "she called me a dirty jew".
    Ok, rant over. Hugs xx

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  23. I hope your face is okay. That just makes me angry! This is why racism exists because MORONS use it as an excuse to take out their own anger.
    I've never heard this story in reverse- like a white girl attacking a group of black people. It's always the other way around. You should be proud though because you did the right thing. YOU ARE BETTER than them so just remember that. They are uneducated morons. So are half the NYPD and security guards too. I've never had faith in the police. They always abuse their authority or just walk away from something like what happened to you. It's disgusting.
    Head up girl!

    F. (opinionslave.blogspot.com) x

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  24. Wow, I cannot imagine something like this happening. I am shocked and enraged reading this post. This sounds horribly traumatic to have to go through, a girl punching you in the face!? and furthermore pulling the race card into the situation. There's so much going on here I can understand how it took you awhile to process the situation enough to post it and also why you felt the need to express the issue. I think you handled the situation as well as you could for how ludicrous it was and how unfairly you were treated. You didn't stoop as low as that girl. It sounds like she was just looking for a fight and took it out on you. I'm so sorry, but remember you are a brave and strong woman and I think we all would've dealt with something like this in the same way.

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  25. I hope these voluminous and heartfelt expressions of sympathy from your readers are helping you, buddy. You've even pulled lurkers out of the shadows to offer support. Your sad story affects all of us in a deep way.

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  26. Wow. I don't even know what to say right now. I cannot believe that actually happened to you. I am so angry this happened to you! That it would happen to anyone. I do not blame you for feeling profoundly disappointed in the world right now, I do too. Lots and lots of hugs from me to you!!

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  27. my heart was racing when i read this post. it's really unfortunate that this girl was black, because i do feel like there are so many crazy/angry people out there who fly off the handle with such violence like this. she may even have thought she heard you say that word (paranoia...). what if she thought she heard you mutter something and thought you had called her a c**t and attacked you? and she was white? i somehow still doubt that the cops would have done anything differently, which speaks volumes about the police department in general but may have nothing to do with race and in fact have more to do with the fact that you were both women. i think it is disgusting and hypocritical that she, thinking you called her a derogatory name, started calling you the white equivalent of that name!

    it saddens me so much that this happened to you--i can't even imagine how shaken i would be by an experience like this--and it's so hard to be politically correct when discussing events like this because there is so much tension there (in the 21st century... it blows my mind). i think you were right to tell this story and that you did it with admirable eloquence, despite the atrocity of it.

    i hope you feel better soon!

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  28. Racism sucks as do liars who abuse their position. I've come across more than one girl who falsley accused a man of assaulting her and even rape. Some people do not have a conscience. Sadly it is simple as that. Sorry you seem to have met a couple of them today.

    Hope your inner and outer bruising feels less tender soon. Don't forget there are a lot of good kids out there - I think you filled your quota of C---- for a long while..

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  29. Speechless. Why can't people realize we are all one? It doesn't matter the color of your skin, the job you have, the family you come from, the person you love, or the God you believe in. We are all human beings and we are all here, we all have the same rights, no one is worth more than anyone else. I am so sorry this happened to you and I am a firm believer in karma. This sad excuse for a human will pay for what she has done. If I were you, I would write Macy's a letter, explaining to them the physical and emotional damage you had to experience while one of their employees on-looked with joy. Hell, I would write on to the NYPD too and let them know that you were assaulted in front of an officer and nothing was done. I can't express my anger and frustration for you.

    You are a very sweet considerate person and you did not deserve for this to happen. If you need anything, I'm just across the river in Chelsea. I'm sure your face is still beautiful as always, purple and all.

    xoxoxo.

    http://southandthecity.blogspot.com/

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  30. Oh my God hun, I want to give you a hug so bad! That is honestly such a terrible, terrible, story and I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes. I really don't have anything to say (at least right now) but I of course agree with everything you said about the nasty cycle of racism. That girl was obviously completely out of line and it is so sad that the authorities couldn't see this. I'm so sorry this happened. <3 you Kallie!

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  31. How horrible and disheartening. This world is in such a sad state. I'm so very sorry to hear about your awful experience.

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  32. oh my shit. that's terrible. i was just frowning/fuming the entire time i was reading that. you didn't deserve that and that girl was a total lunatic. and those cops! sometimes i really have no respect for some police. they just don't really care about the people at all. they think it's just a joke. :'( i'm so sorry, fortunately, most of the world (i think) is not crazy like that. there are good people out there. keep strong.

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  33. What a horrible person! :( I cant believe you had to deal with such a thing. You must have been in the wrong place at the wrong time such an unfortunate event. I have a loathing for the police, I live in England but I doubt they're that different here, my friend gets stopped all the time just because he wears black! I don't believe the world is really an equal place and I hate saying it and it really saddens me but there are always people that I meet that go against this and it gives me hope and makes me smiles :)

    So sorry you had to deal with such a person!

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  34. awww' im so sad for you and angry as well :(:( while reading this i y face kinda feel disguted by the way the citizens react. Especially the Police! and that women must be crazy. over here, everyone is multiracial. theres no sidng and we cn get jailed over this seriously :( Hope u cheer up since theres alot of ppl like tt out there & be strong. Hope u went to the doctor and apply ointment. TAKE CARE!

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  35. Kallie, I have no words for this. I am so sad that these things happen.
    Once in middle school a black girl I didn't even knew picked a fight with me because she stated I was staring at her for being black which wasn't true, I wasn't even staring at anyone... It's really a shame these things happen I don't even know what to say.

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  36. Reading this made me really angry and upset. I really hope you're okay. What an awful thing to have to go through x

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  37. I dont understand some people...doing anything like this is something I would never in my life consider. I like to think most people wouldn't. I hope your ok and I'm sad you had to deal with this. :(

    Shy

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  38. This is sad on all levels. I don't endorse using ANY slang terms that hint at inequality and obviously don't agree with racial slurs, but--even if you HAD insulted the girl in this way--it's ridiculous that it would result in a full blown physical attack.

    I can't say I've had anything similar happen, but it's sad the way things work. I'm very much for equality for everyone. I graduated with a sociology major and my specialty was race and ethnic studies, which, of course, goes hand in hand with social injustices. I've written papers about equality for blacks, or stood up for Native American rights when discussing it with my friends because fairness is important to me. Basically, white girl me has been totally advocating for fairness and racial and ethnic equality. And then I'll run into a black guy when I'm walking by myself downtown and he whistles and says something inappropriate about both my gender and my race and laughs and follows me around. And I try to forget about it, because obviously not all black guys are like this, but it's happened multiple times with the same "usual suspect." So it's really difficult to stand up for equality when this happens over and over, but somehow I know it's the right thing to do.

    I'm shocked at the police's reaction, most of all. What a sad day.

    On the bright side, I'm glad you walked away from the situation okay. It's not pleasant to think about, but at least all you got was a bruise.

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  39. My best friend and I just spent the better part of two hours on a very similar discussion. It pains me everytime something like this or like what happened to her happens because the more emphasis me put on our differences the harder it becomes for us to ever really be equals. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

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  40. OMG! I'm so sorry to hear about what happened. I don't know what to say but I really hope you'll feel better and you come out a better person.

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  41. That is indeed horrible that such a person would seek out trouble like that and want the attention on herself by saying you were giving racist remarks when she was the one doing all the damage. I live near NYC. . .basically. . .it would be best to keep walking without talking at all because she was looking for that, as do a lot of people there. Many people just pick fights for fun. That is truly horrible and I am sorry it occurred to you. People are very cruel and it is not fair in any way at all.

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  42. Ohh I really sorry, and I'm shocked at the same time!! Why people is so ignorant? We all live and the same world and we are exactly the same...I don't know why I'm saying this bc it's so obvious!
    My English level it's no very good.
    I hope you're better now!!! A huge hug!

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  43. Oh wow! I'm so sorry this unfortunate incident had to happen to you. Every line just perversely shocked me. I was growing indignant as well with every cussed line. This is truly unbeleiveable at this time when racism is an antiquaty of the ignorant past. its seems to be alive and thriving. I have a stong pet peeve for people who victimize themselves (regardless of race). The chuckling policeman- completely unacceptable. Its still astonsihing that they condoned her actions so quickly.. I know this is a terrrible thing, but i hope you maintain a positive outlook despite it. hope you feel better :)

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  44. "By playing the system in this way she made a mockery of equality" -- That's EXACTLY it! You put it extremely well, your whole post was brilliant actually. First of all, I am so sorry that you had to go through that! It's awful. Hope you're feeling better by now! And second of all, I understand what you mean when you said that you felt sick during and after the incident. I lived the first ten years of my life in Africa and when I came here I was SHOCKED to see so much racism going both ways (I didn't even know what racism was) but especially how black people can be extremely racist towards white people and nothing will be done. The girl who hit you called you a "white bitch" and no one seemed to do anything but if you had called her a "black bitch"... well, you would've been in deep shit (for lack of a better word). It was such a shock to see people acting that way when I first came to the U.S, seriously, depressing. I was never hit by anyone, but I've been called a few names like "white rich bitch" (which I'm not) and I sometimes get the occasional mean girl stare. Oh and there was this one time when I had a fight with a girl at a part (who happened to be white) and for some weird reason this black girl started getting into the fight even if she had absolutely nothing to do with it becomes she didn't know me or the other girl, and so I kind of said "hey uhh listen I'm having a conversation with this girl so could you please back off a little" and omg you have no idea how angry she got. She started making up so much stuff that I almost wanted to laugh, literally, she was like "JUST BECAUSE I'M BLACK" and I was like "#@%$^@$^&*&^#&%@$@%#@$" that's how I was, I just couldn't believe what she was saying. Pisses me off so much, especially because I have so many black friends! And come on, I was almost born in Africa so how could I EVER be racist?!
    'Nyways, I feel ya sista! And it's all really sad. Hope you're better!
    A big kiss to ya!

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  45. By the way, I must've made lots of mistakes in that huge comment because I'm so freaking tired, so I apologize in advance! Haha.

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  46. Wow. I don't even know what to say right now. I cannot believe that actually happened to you. I am so angry this happened to you! That it would happen to anyone. I do not blame you for feeling profoundly disappointed in the world right now, I do too. Lots and lots of hugs from me to you!!

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  47. Why people feel the need to be rude and hurtful for no reason at all is beyond me. And to think that nothing was done to help your or get your side of the story through the security guard or the NYPD is just unacceptable. It doesn't matter who you are, NO ONE should be treated this way. If it's not too late, I think you should file a complaint with Macy's about the security guard. He obviously wasn't doing his job. As other commenters have said, not everyone is like this.

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  48. Oh Kallie, this is so shocking, I hope you're OK. I don't know what to say. It's awful how the police acted towards you, but at the same time you can sort of see their impossible situation - arresting that girl could have made their statistics look ... racist? I'm not defending their actions at all, just sad that our world is so governed now by oversensitivity that the real problems aren't being dealt with.

    I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. You know those people that you meet and say "You couldn't meet a nicer person"? You always seem like that sort of girl to me. Hope writing about it has been cathartic at least. Take care xx

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  49. Oh My God! This makes me sick to my stomach, specially because I had a similar experience when I was only 16 years old with a 30ish or 40sh old black woman who thought I was "white." And it happened right in New York University Hospital, and even though she was just screaming at me because she thought I had "looked at her wrong," the officer who was right there never even told her to lower her voice. I was in the hospital so I just assumed there must have been something wrong with her head and obviously she had gone through so much in her life that if a "white" person dared even glance her way it was automatically about her race. I was so young, I just stared at her while she screamed at me. I can't even explained how much this affected me. It satyed with me for weeks, I was so shaken up about it.
    I'm so sorry you had to go through this. Youre experience was so much worst i can't even imagine how you feel. Theres so many crazy people out there, whatever race, whatever color, it does not judge. And worst, theres so many others that don't do a thing about it. Its just unfair, and sad.

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  50. Wow. This story reminded me of something that happened to me a couple days ago except flipped. I'm sorry this happened to you. I wish I knew what the fuck was going on in that girl's mind...

    That's not fair that she dropped the race card. Even if you had used it, there is no reason to have gone that low. What was she trying to prove?

    Again, I'm sorry you had to go through this. Some people are ignorant, hateful. I will never understand.

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  51. Oh Kallie, this is so shocking, I hope you're OK. I don't know what to say. It's awful how the police acted towards you, but at the same time you can sort of see their impossible situation - arresting that girl could have made their statistics look ... racist? I'm not defending their actions at all, just sad that our world is so governed now by oversensitivity that the real problems aren't being dealt with.

    I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. You know those people that you meet and say "You couldn't meet a nicer person"? You always seem like that sort of girl to me. Hope writing about it has been cathartic at least. Take care xx

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  52. oh my gosh, i'm so sorry that this happened to you! it's so low of someone to try and place the blame on another by playing the racism card. i would have been so angry with the girl and the police, in fact, i'm angry for you! it really sucks that racism is still relevant at all. :(

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  53. That is indeed horrible that such a person would seek out trouble like that and want the attention on herself by saying you were giving racist remarks when she was the one doing all the damage. I live near NYC. . .basically. . .it would be best to keep walking without talking at all because she was looking for that, as do a lot of people there. Many people just pick fights for fun. That is truly horrible and I am sorry it occurred to you. People are very cruel and it is not fair in any way at all.

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  54. The girl sounds like an absolute c**t, not to waste words.

    A related thing happened to me in elementary school, though not nearly as bad as this. But there was a group of kids who used to chase me around, and when we were all hauled in for questioning, one kid with a hearing disability claimed that I had started it by calling him "deaf kid." Obviously not on the same level as your story, but then again, I was ten and I was shocked...

    Sounds like this girl, apart from being a c**t, has a major chip on her shoulder and has learned that playing the race card is effective. Due to history and countless examples where she would have been in the right, she gets away with it. I think you just have to remember that she's obviously not a happy person to behave that way. You could also make a complaint about the police behaviour, perhaps (or maybe I'm just being naive here).

    I do think it's a different issue from the college admissions however. Those are in place to respond to a history of systemic discrimination and continued deprivation among a large part of the black community.

    Still, a horrible experience, Kallie. Sorry to hear about it.

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